I'm still feeling pretty fuzzy from the anesthsia! I woke up a couple hours after I went to sleep and my urostomy bag is FULL! Why is it not draining into the night bag? So I get up to inspect and find that I never opened the blasted valve on my bag!! Note to self - ALWAYS open the valve when you hook up to your night bag! Ugh! So once I do that it drained and I was able to go back to sleep. Then I wake up in the morning realizing my vaginal discharge had leaked through the pad I was wearing (thankfully I had a waterproof pad underneath me on the bed so none of the bedding got messed up), and so I just needed to clean up. I had planned on taking a bird bath today and asking my husband to wash my hair somehow, but after standing in the bathroom feeling so very indecisive I finally just went for it and got in the shower. It felt so incredibly good to wash my whole body like that for the first time in over a week! But it was pretty exhausting, too! I had to dry off fast, don my robe, and make a bee line for the bed to rest up for the hair drying and hair curling phase. Another thing I'm realizing is that pads are not enough for the fountain of drainage coming out of me, so my precious husband went to the store and bought me adult diapers. Once I had those, I felt like I had a new lease on life! Those things didn't leak at all, and while I still had to change them every 2-3 hours I didn't have to worry about them leaking, praise the Lord!
While I was resting, at 9:51am I got a call from my doctor's office. I answer, and it's my doctor! He proceeded to tell me he had just received the results from the pathology on my bladder and wanted to share them with me. Because I had actually had a negative cytology (even though I had had positive biopsies) I had a small question mark going into the surgery if we were actually removing a non-cancerous bladder, and the doctor said that was a possibility, but even so, with the fact that the cancer keeps coming back he would still recommend it. Well it turns out the pathology showed the bladder had multi-focal carcinoma in situ on the posterior wall, right lateral wall, left lateral wall, anterior wall, and dome, but negative for invasive malignancy. Basically, there was cancer all throughout the lining of the bladder. This was so very confirming that we made the right decision! But even better than that was the news that all margins were clear, all lymph nodes were negative, and so he said, "Jodie, you are cured of cancer!" Wow! Again, SO much to be thankful for!!
My next dilemma fails by comparison to my whole cancer situation, but it was a big question for me, what in the heck was I going to wear today? We had people coming over to pick up a kitten (the 5th of 6 kittens we had to rehome from our 4th and last ragdoll kitten litter), so this was an important question. I rifled through my closet and came up with some overalls and a t-shirt. You could pretty much see how swollen my belly was and I felt like both the bulge from my urostomy bag and the bulge from the JP drain and the bag on my left side were pretty noticable, but what other choices did I have? Not anything that I could see as I stared at the clothes in my closet! My poor choice was evident as the people came in and looked at my face and then their eyes immediately dropped down to my belly - ugh! Not good. Oh well, they stayed for about a half an hour and I stayed in that dreadful outfit for a while longer until I realized just how incredibly uncomfortable I was, so I changed into my PJs. Well, this is a strange feeling to not have anything to wear in public. Can't go out for a walk in my PJs (well, I guess I could, but my self-respect wouldn't let me).
I went ahead and curled my hair, so at least I could feel good about that. I spent a lot of time just sitting and staring. I thought I would come home and watch movies or do some emailing, but as my Grandma used to say, "My get up and go, got up and went!" I just wasn't motivated to do much of anything! Totally not like me at all.
I was, however, still wondering about when the home health care nurse was going to come see me. I thought it was supposed to be today? So I called there and was told it would be tomorrow, and that I would be hearing from the nurse with a timeframe.
At about 5:00pm I got a text from a friend who was aware of my clothing dilemma, "Hi Princess! I've got some clothes for you to try ... may I drop them by?" Are you kidding?? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! But I simply answer, "Would love that!" So I sit and wait for what felt like forever, but just a little over an hour later she makes several trips to her car and drops about 30 dresses on my couch!! What?????? Are you kidding??? Oh my goodness, these are PERFECT!! I'm beyond grateful! She asks if there is anything she can for me while she's here, and I start to say that I can't think of anything and then I remember my hairy legs! Yes - would you mind shaving my legs? Not at all, she replies! She notices my toenails need painting so she proceeds to do that, too! I'm beginning to feel like a new woman! I have clothes to wear, shaved legs, and toes painted! Grateful beyond words!!!!
While I was resting, at 9:51am I got a call from my doctor's office. I answer, and it's my doctor! He proceeded to tell me he had just received the results from the pathology on my bladder and wanted to share them with me. Because I had actually had a negative cytology (even though I had had positive biopsies) I had a small question mark going into the surgery if we were actually removing a non-cancerous bladder, and the doctor said that was a possibility, but even so, with the fact that the cancer keeps coming back he would still recommend it. Well it turns out the pathology showed the bladder had multi-focal carcinoma in situ on the posterior wall, right lateral wall, left lateral wall, anterior wall, and dome, but negative for invasive malignancy. Basically, there was cancer all throughout the lining of the bladder. This was so very confirming that we made the right decision! But even better than that was the news that all margins were clear, all lymph nodes were negative, and so he said, "Jodie, you are cured of cancer!" Wow! Again, SO much to be thankful for!!
My next dilemma fails by comparison to my whole cancer situation, but it was a big question for me, what in the heck was I going to wear today? We had people coming over to pick up a kitten (the 5th of 6 kittens we had to rehome from our 4th and last ragdoll kitten litter), so this was an important question. I rifled through my closet and came up with some overalls and a t-shirt. You could pretty much see how swollen my belly was and I felt like both the bulge from my urostomy bag and the bulge from the JP drain and the bag on my left side were pretty noticable, but what other choices did I have? Not anything that I could see as I stared at the clothes in my closet! My poor choice was evident as the people came in and looked at my face and then their eyes immediately dropped down to my belly - ugh! Not good. Oh well, they stayed for about a half an hour and I stayed in that dreadful outfit for a while longer until I realized just how incredibly uncomfortable I was, so I changed into my PJs. Well, this is a strange feeling to not have anything to wear in public. Can't go out for a walk in my PJs (well, I guess I could, but my self-respect wouldn't let me).
I went ahead and curled my hair, so at least I could feel good about that. I spent a lot of time just sitting and staring. I thought I would come home and watch movies or do some emailing, but as my Grandma used to say, "My get up and go, got up and went!" I just wasn't motivated to do much of anything! Totally not like me at all.
I was, however, still wondering about when the home health care nurse was going to come see me. I thought it was supposed to be today? So I called there and was told it would be tomorrow, and that I would be hearing from the nurse with a timeframe.
At about 5:00pm I got a text from a friend who was aware of my clothing dilemma, "Hi Princess! I've got some clothes for you to try ... may I drop them by?" Are you kidding?? PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! But I simply answer, "Would love that!" So I sit and wait for what felt like forever, but just a little over an hour later she makes several trips to her car and drops about 30 dresses on my couch!! What?????? Are you kidding??? Oh my goodness, these are PERFECT!! I'm beyond grateful! She asks if there is anything she can for me while she's here, and I start to say that I can't think of anything and then I remember my hairy legs! Yes - would you mind shaving my legs? Not at all, she replies! She notices my toenails need painting so she proceeds to do that, too! I'm beginning to feel like a new woman! I have clothes to wear, shaved legs, and toes painted! Grateful beyond words!!!!
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